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The Only Guide to the Puppy Bowl You’ll Ever Need

The Only Guide to the Puppy Bowl You’ll Ever Need

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What puppy does not dream of grid iron glory?

Puppy Bowl X is the biggest sporting event in the world, if not, the entire woofing universe. Kicking off at February 2 at 3 PM, this game pits the No. 1 offense against the No. 2 defense, and adorableness will reign supreme. Who will rise above the scrum to claim gridiron glory?

The BarkPost’s Top Picks for the 2014 Puppy Bowl:

Abdiel:

First to hit the field is quarterback Abdiel, a Labrador retriever/terrier mix. He brings the cuddle! Like Baltimore Colts legend Johnny Unitas, Abdiel played semi-pro football for $3 per game. Abdiel’s only weakness is his frequent need for in game nap time.

Abdiel

Abdiel : Photo courtesy of Animal Planet

Bayla:

Coming up next is boxer/hound mix Bayla who is sure to be a household name by the end of the game. She’s a camera-canoodler who is known for her no-nonsense hard-hitting style. When she is not leveling the competition on the playing field, she is often seen canoodling on floor with her teammates.

Bayla

Bayla : Photo courtesy of Animal Planet

Artemis:

If you are looking for the softest puppy on four legs, look no further than Artemis. But don’t let her adorable mug deceive you. Last game, she commandeered a last-gasp drive to secure her place in the Puppy Bowl starting lineup.

Artemis

Artemis : Photo courtesy of Animal Planet

Aurora:

Aurora, a curious Dalmatian, possesses the marvelous attributes of the Puppy Bowler: play calling genius, tireless enthusiasm, and bottomless endurance. She is sure to run circles around her competitors as she puppy-prances down the field like a gazelle.

Aurora

Aurora : Photo courtesy of Animal Planet

Benton:

Like Broadway Joe, Labrador retriever Benton has guaranteed victory in the pregame press conferences leading up to the Puppy Bowl. He’s swagger off the field is backed up by his proficiency on the field.

Benton

Benton : Photo courtesy of Animal Planet

Coco:

Don’t let appearances fool you. Coco is hard-nosed blocker that levels defensive tackles. Many see her as the heart-and-soul of the backfield.

Coco

Coco : Photo courtesy of Animal Planet

Lily:

As the defensive linchpin in Puppy Bowl X, Lily the Basset Hound can smell fear in the heart of her opponents. She’s long, big-boned, and stout. In the trenches, her thick coat repels most, if not all, running backs.

Lily

Lily : Photo courtesy of Animal Planet

Quick and agile, leggy Loren is always ready for a rumble. Though slight, she will never back down from a tussle. Last season, she led the league in tennis ball interceptions (36)!

Loren

Loren : Photo courtesy of Animal Planet

Ginger:

What Ginger lacks in ferocity, she makes up for in gentleness. As a loveable homebody, she just wants to cuddle with her forever family as soon as the big game is over.

Puppy Bowl X Hero Shots

Ginger : Photo courtesy of Animal Planet

Mandy:

Mandy is a tenacious tackler that has terrorized wide receivers all season. She received national recognition last week for her game-saving pass breakup and post-game interview. She’s as fiery off the field as she is on it!

Mandy

Mandy : Photo courtesy of Animal Planet

Taser and Sharpie:

Despite their humble beginnings, these two brothers are scrappy and are there to win. Never underestimate the skinny guys. 😉
MAin

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This will be a game of adorableness versus adorableness, canoodling versus canoodling. Legends will rise and fall on the battlefield. That said, Benton guaranteed victory leading up to the big show, and who am I to doubt him.

Benton guarantees victory at poolside.

Benton guarantees victory at poolside in Miami.

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